The Will to be True Blog

It’s been quite a while since I’ve owned a car.  My last owned vehicle was a Ford van,  which I purchased in 2000.  It was three years old and had ‘work horse’ stamped all over it.  I bought it with the idea of transporting clients back and forth from the airport to my delightful spa place in the country where me and my gang of healers would help women to renew life and spirit.  That dream didn’t pan out as I hoped but as long as I still had the van, it was a possibility.

That was a decade ago.  The van was indeed a work horse and life saver.  My husband was driving when he was hit by another car.  The sturdy van, seat belt and airbag saved his life.  But  it meant that another part of my dream had faded. 

In between, it’s purchase and its demise, the long distance travelling began to take its gas toll on my pocket, so I invested in a small efficient car which served me well.  When the lease expired, just months after the van’s untimely demise, , I had to make a decision.  With the van gone, I needed a vehicle which would meet all my needs.  I had a plan to get another larger type of van-truck combo, but my husband already had another van.  ‘Get a car’ he advised.  And, I did.

I don’t know how I suddenly became aware of how much owning a car is different from leasing.  This is my transport now.  I don’t keep it neat.  It carries everything I may ever need at any given time.  I know that.  It watches over me while I drive with all its electronics and gadgets in constant motion.  Nice,  but my needs are simple.  I have to be able to play my mp3 players.  I have three of them and hundreds of songs to listen to.  The play list is my best friend.  A bluetooth device mostly saves me from distracted driving, if I remember to turn it on. 

In the front seat, with the winter approaching, I notice that there is a growing pile of warm things, like gloves, hats, extra sweaters, scarf, etc.  There are four large handbags, one for each of my different jobs.  When I arrive at work, I just pick up which ever one is designated for that site.  There’s an extra handbag in the trunk, just in case, I get a new job. 

There are wires for my large portable speaker system and a lecturn in case I am doing public speaking and the site doesn’t have one.  I have a full library of books to read in case I get stuck somewhere.  (last count 32).  There is a candle, incense, aromatherapy, oils and creams in case my hands are dry and I need an uplifting scent.  Nail file, and buffer, for that quick on the go manicure.  There are extra wires and USB lines for the endless electronic equipment which needs renewal i.e. computers, Ipod, Bluetooth camera.

It is hardly worthwhile talking about all the binders full of papers, (good if I need to start a fire to keep warm) and shoes.  The only thing missing and the reason why I did this inventory was a lack of facilities.  When my friend and I used to do long distance driving, we had a porto-potty.  That’s missing!  And in the extras ‘I don’t need it category’ are boxes of baby clothes.  Don’t even ask about the number of green bags which I always remember when I am done shopping and the cart, to carry my groceries and save my shoulders.  (Oh yeah! forgot that too!)

Inside my little moving house is everything I need to sustain life and keep in touch with the world.  I am sure most people have as much if not more.  I’ve seen cars piled high with junk.  It is just amazing how much of our lives is spent on the road.  I want a car to take care of me and make me feel safe, with numerous  things inside to nurture me, just as my mother did.  In turn, I will take care of it too.